Very Bad Archive
i hate you more tahn broccoli
Emerson Biggens
you stole my poor heart
that did not want to leave
just like a bank rober
you evil freaking thieve!
and then you made me cut
my arms up with some razors
and if I could I would zap you
like the cops do with their tasers!
since you cheated on me with that
exchange student from South Korea
and I hope that she gives to you
both crabs and gonorreah!
as well as a yeast infection also
and some really bad Herpes
so that you develop some genital sores
that are red like cherry slurpees!
because you used to rock
just like Blackie Lawless
from the band known as W.A.S.P.
but now you’re not so flawless!
and I just want to bust you
right on your stupid nose
so the chicks won’t say no more
how much you look like Axel Rose!
And some nights I want to take a bat
And bash till you deaden
Because you ruined my whole life
Just like Armageddon!
And because you made me feel
a whole lot like dung,
oh how I wish that you
would just take a plung
into some big river
such as the Yangstee,
because you made me feel
so very angsty!
Emerson Biggens has published since joining on 30/11/99. Read more of Emerson's terrible poetry at the anthology. Here are three of Emerson's latest works: