Very Bad Archive
The Lunchlady
Gaius Caesar
Oh, sweet siren,
Who ladles my lunch.
Do you love me?
I have a hunch...
Your words are kind.
But if you love me as you say,
Then I have a problem.
For every weekday...
On Meatloaf Monday,
I have yet to find
Though I search in vain,
"Meat" of any kind.
On Taco Tuesday,
Every word, I yell.
For no one can hear me
Over my awful smell.
On Waffle Wednesday,
My feelings worsen
For I'll be frank,
I'm not really a "breakfast person".
On Thursday,
No matter what you serve
I cannot eat;
I haven't the nerve
And finally, on Friday
We're through; moreover,
I haven't the strength to face
The week's leftovers.
And so, my sweet,
Beyond any doubt,
I'll love you forever,
But only if I eat take-out.
Gaius Caesar has published another poem since joining on 30/11/99. Read more of Gaius's terrible poetry at the anthology. Here are three of Gaius's latest works: