Very Bad Poetry

Pen in hand I ponder were to begin.
To correct all of histories fallacies.
Naturally it's incumbent upon me.
To relate which I was articulate.
Directly responsible the architect.
That I have tintypes and daguerreotypes as proof.
My defeat of the British army at Resaca de la Palma.
Cerro Gordo and their ultimate demise the battle at the Alamo.
Led by the High English Conquest Admiral Hitler.
I smashed the combined forces of the deviant evil incarnates.
Of the English Ladies Auxiliary and American Women's Red Cross.
Marched my Mongol Horde through the Arc de Triomphe.
In Tokyo to the honor of the Kasier and our victory.
Over the Hunnish Confederate Yankees.
Thus establishing my estates on the pampas in Scotland.
My palace on the great steppes of New Jersey.
As Bobby emperor the first declares.
A easy enough theorem explains all.
Your universe cannot contract beyond.
It's lowest state of your mentality.
That minimum consisting of a head of pure bone.
As applied by unified field equations.
Such a state the uncertainty principles.
Eliminate you singular as power behind your porcelain throne.
Thus you arrive at the imperative concomitments.
That your Emperor Bobby!
Is awaiting his beer and sandwich.
So get off your ass and hump.
Hump and HUMP!
--------
bobby

note;
the quasi Mr. Miss. Underhill in the over the shoulder bolder holder.
Points out that in referance to Cerro Gordo or Gerro Gordo depends upon.
Yale or Columbia university.
Svelte Miss Underhill nodding approval.
With my beer and sandwich while wearing pasties and bio-nutritional panties.
Pantomiming a worthy rendition of the "Christmas Carol" by Charles Dickens.

Robert Hawkins has published 2 more terrible poems since joining on 30/11/99. Read more of Robert's terrible poetry at the anthology. Here are three of Robert's latest works: