Very Bad Archive
"In Which Our Heroine Feels A Mite Chilly."
Ceejay Writer
The temperature outside was twenty,
We said "No problem, we've got coats a-plenty"
But then it slipped down to nineteen.
We said "Ma Nature's being mean."
When eighteen hit,
We said "Aw shit!"
Then seventeen! Sixteen! Fifteen! Fourteen!
This is getting quite obscene!
Thirteen arrived and was pounced by twelve.
Outdoor plans got put on the shelve.
Eleven! Ten!
Stoppit, then!
We're sliding down the hill to nine,
And all we care to do is whine.
When eight arrived
We barely survived.
Now the thermostat reads seven.
This ain't exactly toasty heaven.
But we're not done! Now dropping to six!
"It's gonna stop here", the forecaster predicts.
But weather-folk are never right,
And five degrees makes one cold-ass night.
Degree number four,
I will choose to ignore.
Now we're shivering and the thermometer reads three.
Which isn't a cause for parties or glee.
Two degrees, when rubbed together,
Do not produce fire, or warmer weather.
That solo one.
This ain't no fun! >:(
Zero means nothing, bupkus, nada
A big bunch of zippo, the whole enchilada.
But gleefully the mercury continues to tumble
Minus one caused our shreds of sanity to crumble.
If it drops down to minus two,
I don't know what I will be expected to do.
Perhaps what's needful for this Michigander
Is to aim towards Hawaii, on a needful meander.
Ceejay Writer has published 2 more terrible poems since joining on 30/11/99. Read more of Ceejay's terrible poetry at the anthology. Here are three of Ceejay's latest works: