Very Bad Archive
Have Sex!
gooz bood
have sex!
you, yes you.
i'm talking to YOU!
sex, yes, sex.
i'm talking about sex.
sex and you.
you and sex.
where have you two been all this time?
baa ham ghahr kardin?*
have you ever even met?
if not, then let me introduce you
to each other.
Sex, meet You.
You, meet Sex.
"Pleased to meet you [finally]."
"Nice to make your acquaintance."
Oh now you two, don't be so formal and bashful.
Go ahead, mingle, talk, get to know each other.
You might discover something you didn't know before.
Like sex can be fun!
Sex can be good for your health!
Sex can put a smile on your face!
...and a smile on someone else's face!
People should have sex, not wars.
Let Bush and Saddam settle their differences
over a candle-lit dinner followed by a private rendezvous
complete with aromatic scents, soothing music and massage oil.
That'll put a smile on a lot of people's faces, instead of
tears in their eyes.
Have sex if you're single or married (with your
spouse's prior written approval, of course);
a student or a workaholic;
young or old (subject to local minimum age ordinances).
You should have sex on Tuesday afternoon and Friday morning.
Not to mention every other hour and day of the week
that you feel the urge.
Have sex in the car, by the beach, in a cheap motel
and an expensive hotel. You might also try the dressing room
at Macy's and the elevator of any major hotel
between the 12th and 13th floors.
So that's my advice to all of you.
Have sex TODAY!
Don't let another day go by without it.
You're missing out on a great secret
to a happy life....(although it's not the only ingredient!)
And don't wait for Love to have sex.
Have it before and after so you can compare.
And don't fall in love because all you really wanted was sex.
Sex is here now, it's free, and everybody is doing it.
So do it!
Have sex.
* "have you been cross with each other?"
gooz bood has published 2 more terrible poems since joining on 30/11/99. Read more of gooz's terrible poetry at the anthology. Here are three of gooz's latest works: