Very Bad Archive
Disfigured
Amrita Gupta
My heart hurts
Just thinking about you
Your smiling face
That makes me want to cry
Every time I see it
Its beauty
The thrill of knowing you’re there
Even if you don’t recognize me
Even if I’m invisible to you
I love you
I want to smile
Every time you smile at me
Every time you look at me
And not through me
I force out courtesy
Only for you
But I know it is pointless
There is no hope
Something is wrong
I am horribly disfigured
But I can’t see it
The only people that can
Are in the category:
“Everyone”
I now know this
And because I love you
I will promise
To stop acting like such a fool
Because all the times I
Started to feel good about myself
Like I might actually be worth something
There was nothing to feel good about
I led myself into a trap
I now know
That I don’t deserve to
Hold my head high
Don’t deserve common courtesy
Don’t deserve to have people
Look at me
Some of them are indifferent
But most of them
And that’s everyone I care about
Sees me for what I am
A stupid fraud
That is horribly disfigured
And doesn’t deserve to be loved
Amrita Gupta has published 2 more terrible poems since joining on 30/11/99. Read more of Amrita's terrible poetry at the anthology. Here are three of Amrita's latest works: